52 Comments

Raju, this piece is such brilliance-- I think I run to your pieces to see the acrobatics and scampering children - that's how ideas and connections move through your pieces - I cannot usually comment on a moment in the essay - it is the places it takes me to and a long neglected tiny muscle in this body moves every time I read you

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Roshni, I have read your comment several times, wondering how I can never forget it. It is like the most incredible thing anyone's said to me about my writing.. the part about acrobatics. What feels like a mess of wires to me is elevated to another level by your generous reading. Thank you for letting your tiny muscles be moved. I think that happened to me when I read home and roam.. 💜🌻🌿

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I've used that word for your writing whenever I discuss it with someone or think about it in my head ..i think it was your love waala poem which featured elephants that gave me this image .. I read it and was immediately like kya gymnastics hai ye !

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I have always loved that word.. a marathi aunt would call it gynmastics and we would laugh with lips closed.. ♥️ jo cheez body nahi kar sakti hai woh writing kar sakti..

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Raju Rani, badi Sayani! 🤗🤗🤗 maano yaa naa maano, ochre skies is the best family. Keeps growing better than Indian families. All black sheep here. Best! Behad mazzedaar.

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100% Ochre Sky ke kaaran hi finding joy in family. Where and how else could I have found a Sana!!! Imagining not knowing you makes me feel instantly sad. 💜🌻🌿

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Raju, this was beautiful :)

Thank you for writing so tenderly as traversed through every nook and corner of what is a family. Your writing is a gift to us💛

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Sanskriti!!!! I love that you’re the first person to read and comment… your essay this week brought me to tears more than once. I can never forget the new family photograph. I will never forget your journey. 💘💛

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To be read with such warmth. To be witnessed with such intensity. So grateful to you for this and for bringing out that essay from me💛 🤗

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Rajuuu, I read and re read it. I’m go glad that your internal family told you to pen this down in the dark under the blanket. Totally in love with this one ❤️

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Priya, bohot saara Shukriya. Thank you for reading with such love. ❤️

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‘Because our family doesn’t communicate, we discover art and master articulation.‘ You have described the nub of centuries of creative inspiration with this one sentence.

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Binu, thank you. You highlight things back to me and I am amazed. What a kind reading... as always.. 💜🌻🌿

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Wow. How is this doing so much all at once? No glossing over, no romanticising, and yet not slipping into the family-as-pain view. This is such a hope coloured lens to see the concept of family, painful warts and all. Particularly loved that you refused to subsume friends under the category of family.

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Koyel, I have never been read the way you read me. What is this amazing comment and how can I show you my joy and surprise when I first read it.. Sometimes readers draw out more from a piece than the writer planned consciously.. Thank you... Hope to write with you soon. 💜🌻🌿

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<3 <3 <3 Your writing is extraordinary, and it gives readers so much! Really looking forward to writing with you soon!

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Raju this is such a gorgeous essay. every line, every phrase sparkles! Thank you for bringing out so many families and evoking many more through your writing ❤️🤗

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Doel, thank you for your encouragement... It never goes to waste. I carry it into writing the next post... 💜🌻🌿

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Lovely post tai. I couldn't stop myself from reading immediately, when i saw the word 'family' - this notion, as you know, always draws powerful feelings for me :)

i loved the way you deconstructed ways of thinking about different types of "family". we differ (and it is a beautiful difference) in our approaches to "blood family" perhaps - my experiences have nourished what I see as a healthy distancing from the structural power dynamics inherent in the patriacrchal construction of the modern parenting relationship, and its heteronormativity, demands ye wo. But also, i see choice differently - on a friend's fridge, I recently saw the sentence - 'friends are the family I choose for myself'. I loved it so much that I appropriated it as a way of articulating how i have always seen my friends (my close friends the ones who are "like family"). I think i like the aspect of 'choice' that both distances me from "familial" trauma, and toxic environments, even as I get to choose who I hope to sustain relationships with, and with what boundaries, and imagination. Perhaps this is a difference, only of articulation, and maybe we are on the same page.

nevertheless, thankyou for this sensitive piece of writing on a beautiful sunday morning. it truly helped me deepen my own views of "family" as social unit, and relationship.

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We are definitely on the same page, aranya. Yet I also know that we are two characters from two different books and hence we must air that which is different and also envision better stories for ourselves. So thank you for reading and responding, even when this is not a rosy subject. <3 Point number 9 ke last line mein I see your contribution. Remember your response, when I shared Aai's letter? I respect/admire your healthy distancing and at the same time how open you are to narratives of all shades.

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This one just bubbles over with Raju-ness! I guffawed at the asteroids and the solitary teeth, smiled at the de-cluttering of the fridge, marvelled at the strength of your Hukkum Ka Ikka and pondered over your deep question at the end. What a storyteller you are!!

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Thank you Alaknanda. I am taking your appreciation into my bones so that when self doubt strikes again I continue to write. Hugs.

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Lovely essay! So many threads to follow, so much to unpack.

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Thank you, Rohan. So glad to be read by you. 💜🌻

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Waah!!! So many families. So many people you can call home🤩. ☺️

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Yay, thank you Savvy... Your comment filled me with gratitude and khushi.. 💜🌻

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Lovely insights, Raju! Glad to see you're touching hearts with your work.

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Gosh, Evelyn! I hope you can imagine how much it means to me, to be read by you.. :) 💜🌸

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Raju- This is such an observant piece, especially your view on "chosen family." I love its keenness. Hope you're well this week. Cheers, -Thalia

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Thalia, so so good to hear from you and discover you. Thank you for reading with such care... Hoping to read you soon. 💜🌻🌿

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Gosh, I LOVED this! So imaginative, and yet totally reality at the same time. Always so much complexity within and between families and impossible to understand what is going on from the outside (or sometimes even from inside). Thanks for the beautiful writing ✨

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Dear Holly, What a beautiful comment. It made me think and think and think. And today when I look at it I simply feel grateful. For substack and your kindness and for the capacity to take our times as we unravel the complexity. 💜🌻🌿

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You're totally welcome Raju, it was a joy reading your story!

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Wonderful post, which I only managed to just read. So glad that you are part of my online family, Raju!

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Aww Dipali, that's one of the best comments ever! You have made several online families better by your attentive reading and generous presence. 💜🌻🌿

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One big squishy hugs coming your way, Raju!❣️

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🤗🤗🤗

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I love the whole essay but the extended family descending down on us like asteroids has stayed etched in my memory😆 And Point Number Seven is so precious !❤️❤️

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Alaknanda, thank you for encouraging this essay from the moment it came out on Slack... and then here. I remember your comment and the smile brought on my face. 💜🌻🌿

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